The Audience

We have all seen the shots of teenage girls screaming, fainting and being carried away from Elvis and Beatles concerts. Wow - that is raw emotion right there. The real deal.

Is it the same now when we see shots of teenage girls (and boys) reacting in a similar way to the latest non-threatening-teen-boy-band-beat-combo, or have we been 'programmed' to react in this way? I expect it feels just as real to the screamers and fainters of today, but the teenagers of the 1950's and 60's had no blueprint to follow (I think Hitler sometimes had a similar impact on his audience, but those are deep and treacherous waters there matey).

We all do it when we go to gigs - cheerin' and hollerin' before the band even plays a note, and then going nuts after every song. Why? Is it just because we're enjoying ourselves, or is it because it is what we believe the succulent rock star that we have already paid out the best part of a weeks wages to see expects of us, and we've seen other people do the same thing on telly? I hope it's the former.

Maybe it's the same in a pub-rock scenario. We all love it when the audience makes a lot of noise - it's good for our egos, because we all just want to be loved. But I really hope that when it happens it's not contrived and is a reflection of people having a genuinely good time.

For the most part I have no issues with the audience. In 25 years of playing (I picked up the bass at birth) I have only ever been thumped on stage once, only ever hit a member of the audience with my bass once, and can count occurences of all out warfare on one hand. There's only one thing that really annoys, and that's when people try to talk to me while I'm playing. I acknowledge that the bass guitar is the second easiest instrument in the world to master, but there are three points that I'd like to make to anyone tempted to ask me if we can do *______(*insert song of your choice here - it's normally Mustang Sally) when I'm doing my funky groove thang:

1 - I can't hear you
2 - Even if I could hear you, I can't talk when I'm playing so can't respond
3 - You're pissed. Your breath smells

So if anyone tries to do that to me ever agin, I'll lick their face. You have been warned!